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He smiles at me with that glint in his eye that I’ve come to love.  He leans over, kisses me, pulls back just a little and says, “Do you know what today is?”

I smile back and nod, expecting him to turn and go about his day, but he stays.  Inches from my face with twinkling eyes, he bumps my nose with his.  This little, affectionate gesture he has done since we were dating always makes me laugh inside. He moves in for another kiss and lingers.
I don’t know how he can melt my heart with the simplest thing still, after all these years,
but he does.  And I am delighted.

He pulls back and says, “I’m so glad you’re my wife.  I love you.”  The earnestness in his voice takes me by surprise.  “I’m so glad we made it.”

“I am too”, I respond laying my head on his chest.  “This”, I say hugging him tighter, “was worth the fight, huh?”

“Worth every minute”, he replies.

It is our anniversary.
Thirty-two years ago he swept a very young me over the threshold,  bundled me up and toted me 3 states away from my family of origin to a life that would be surprising, eye-opening, and at times arduous.

He made a commitment to me, carved it on the stone of his character
and has lived and breathed it even when it would have been easier to turn away.

What made him, us hold on through the years of hell?
What made us sleep in the same bed even though we believed we despised each other?
What made us stay instead of leaving?
What made us decide to fight for our marriage instead of with each other?
There are no logical answers to these questions.

Perhaps because God wanted the better for us rather than the easy.

This is God’s grace in our lives.
His love and mercy poured on us, a hard, driving rain,
carving out the ruts in the road that would lead us to where we are today.

My man has never been one for grand gestures, flowery words or showy displays so I expect none.  But he writes on my soul day in and day out by living out his love for me.

He makes my coffee
with the perfect amount of sweetness and cream every morning and evening.
He works like a heathen looking for redemption to provide for me.
He wars for my affection against the temptations of this world,
blocking their distractions with
his unswerving devotion.

His love has shown me a measure of  how Jesus feels about me.
His love is marked by giving, not getting.

His love has helped make me whole.

His words make me feel beautiful and lovely and loved.
Everything he does and says seems to make me want to be a better me.
(see Ephesians 5 in The Message translation)
He challenges me to rise above the pain-conceived concept of who I am,
what I can do and what is expected of me.
He dares me to go further,
reach higher,
love deeper,
stretch harder
risk more.

Many times I have asked him what I can do for him.  Surely there is something he wants from me,
wishes I would do to make him happier.
And all he ever wants is my love, my devotion, my time.
He loves it when I lay everything else aside and just sit with him.
He makes no demands on me.
He requires nothing of me and this love makes me willing to do anything for him.

I would follow this man into battle, hoping and praying I am woman enough to stand next to him.  Together we war for those we love. Praying that they be consumed with the all-consuming love of God.

Joined at the soul we fight the fight together
determined to hold on to that thing we find most precious –
each other.

Praying you find this same measure of grace…


3 Comments

  1. Barb Arant Stumbo

    October 2, 2010 9:48 am

    Are you kidding me??? You are an awesome writer! Tears came to my eyes as I read. Keep it up and I will look forward to reading more!
    So sorry we missed the gathering in Iowa. We had made plans to go to New Mexico with our son and family. Sounds like you had a great time.
    Take care!
    Barb from Iowa

  2. Sarah Selee

    April 17, 2018 1:38 pm

    Thank you for your bold and beautiful words, Angie. Grateful to have found your voice.

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